Roman Halloween 2008 or Drunken Monkness

Okay, here are a few of the Halloween pics. Enjoy! The Bible is real, it was a gift recently given to me by a friend, who happens to be a priest. I'm actually reading it at the moment but that's a different post. The chalice was plastic and though quite expensive, it turned out to be a fantastic prop. I had a monk bag as well that I carried all of the essentials in, ie., Jameson, Jagermeister, wallet and cellular phone. It was a fun night, I'm not smiling in a few of the pics because being a monk is serious business, obviously.

Meganne

Alastair

Friends from Iowa State U. Heidi, Sarah and Victoria

Me, Sarah, Luciano, and Tim

Tim (Slash), and Ajda

Tom from the Abbey and Luciano

The Good Book, Me and Luciano

My old friend Dave from the Monastery

Dave and I after a bit of the sacrelig, notice the girl (a friend) trying to get in the shot!

Alastair, Heidi, Sarah, Victoria

Happy Halloween!

Wow, this is sort of becoming a monthly blog, isn't it? Let me give you the run down on what's been happening here in Roma. First of all, work is running my life at the moment. Between lessons for the school, private lessons three nights a week, and three nights a week at the pub, I'm quite exhausted. But I'm still managing to find time for a little fun.

Here's a little example; on Monday evening I worked at the pub (unusual but I was filling in for someone). I got home and into bed by 3:15, woke up at 7:15 because I had made plans to have a classic Italian breakfast (cappucino and cornetto while standing on your feet) with a girl before work at 9:15. I had a lunch break from 2-3 at which time I met up with a different girl to have a sandwich in the nearby piazza. Then from 3-4:30 I had a lesson after which I headed home to relax before I had a private lesson at 7:30. The problem was that the university students have been protesting here in Roma practically daily for the past 2 weeks so the traffic in the center was completely shut down and I had to walk home in the rain. Guess who isn't supporting the students? After my private lesson I met with yet another girl for a couple of drinks at a place near the lesson. The day ended at 12am for me! Of course, everyday isn't like this one (thankfully) but I'm trying to do everthing I can everyday to keep myself busy and entertained.

In other news, I'll be heading to Dublin, London and SEATTLE (!!!) for nearly the entire month of December. The first eight days will be in Dublin and London and then I'll be in Seattle until the 29th. Mark your calendars, stock up on the Coors Light, Hershey's Chocolate, Welch's Grape Juice and all of the other American goodies that I've been missing for the past two and a half years cause I'm going to see all of you very soon and as much as possible.

Past, Present and Future Tenses

I tried to tell her if you could not accept the past and its burden there was no future, for without one there cannot be the other, and how if you could accept the past you might hope for the future, for only out of the past can you make the future.

Robert Penn Warren - All the King's Men


I've been trying to write this post for about a month but every time I sat down to start I found myself at a loss for words. I'm starting to understand what Warren meant when he wrote that way back in the day. I know that I haven't accepted the past and its burden because I just can't seem to think about the future. The burdens of the past for me here in Rome are as ubiquitous as the city's churches. Before work last night I went to get some fried fish from a place WE used to go to. I passed by a bar that WE bought beer from once during a night out in Campo de Fiori. I'm struggling to move on. I know that as time goes on, I'll have new experiences with new people. These new experiences will slowly replace the old ones but for now it's hard for me to see that far into the future.

As for the good news, for there is some. I'm working a lot. Between lessons for the school, private lessons three evenings a week and three nights in the pub I'm really keeping it moving and making a little money. I just started teaching group lessons at the Ministry of Justice (comical given my status) and these new groups have made me realize how good I am after two years. Unfortunately, this has led me down a dark path and right into a dangerous question about my future, "Is this it?" Am I going to be teaching English from here on out? I'm not disparaging the profession in any way but am I not slouching towards Bethlehem (in terms of career choices)? Those are a few of the thoughts that occupy my troubled mind while I'm not working.

'Namo (Roman for Let's Go!)

First things first. Sorry for not writing for the last four weeks. I'm going to start writing again very soon. Unfortunately, I got a virus! Well, not me but my laptop. I just wanted to watch Back to the Future (Where we're going, we don't need roads!) online but I ended up with this nasty new virus that is really annoying me.

So, what have I been doing since way back in mid-August? Mostly working on my Ernest Hemingway impression. You all know that I haven't been writing and that I don't hunt or fish, so what does that make me? I don't own a shotgun so don't be too worried. But I digress and I hate digressing. Now I'm back at the pub three or four days a week, I've picked up three hours of private lessons on the nights I'm not working at the pub and the teaching hours are just about in full swing. All of these things are keeping me pretty busy at the moment which is good because when I'm sitting around at home I get a bit lonesome.

Lonesome. I suppose that's a decent enough description of my current state. During the first few months after Allie left, I was really angry (still am) and I was just evading reality (Rule Number 1: Never Evade Reality) but now I'm realizing what she meant to me and how important she was in every single aspect of my life. What does that mean? I don't know, I'm trying to figure it out myself.

Summer Break

In honor of the Italian tradition of doing nothing except going to the beach for the entire month of August, I've decided to take a little break from writing for the rest of the month. I don't think I'll be going on holiday this month but if I happen to do something exciting, I'll post it. Hope everyone has a great month. A Settembre!

Rome's Favorite Artist (And Mine Too!)

I finally made it back to the Galleria Borghese after about a year of talking about going again and I'm beyond pleased I did. Since I had recently seen the most famous David in the world I wanted to see Bernini's David again to see if it was really as great as I thought it was. They are very different takes on the same story which makes it hard to say which is better. Michelangelo's David is looking off into the distance after he defeated Goliath while Bernini's is crouched and is preparing for the battle of his life. Michelangelo's is a massive sculpture that represents the power of David while Bernini's seems almost life-size and very agile. I should admit that I'm biased as a quasi-Roman but hands down, Bernini's David is superior. Okay, so it wasn't that hard that hard to say which is better.

I liked Bernini's David the first time I saw it but this time I just stood and stared in absolute reverence with goose bumps covering my arms and the hair standing on the back of my neck. It is incredibly powerful. How Bernini took a single piece of stone and made it into something that conveys, action, strength, and even more impressive, emotion is just unreal. David's jaw is set. His feet are planted firmly in the ground. His sling is cocked back. Every muscle on his body is tensed as he readies himself to strike Goliath with a deadly blow. You can see in David's fixed gaze that he will not be denied victory by anyone or anything. Regardless of whether or not you know the story of David and Goliath, by simply looking at David's face, you realize that truly, anything is possible with that level of determination.

We Are NOT the World

That a doctor should have any right, desire or choice in the matter, was regarded as irrelevant selfishness; his was not to choose, they said, only 'to serve.' Let them discover what kind of doctors their system will now produce. Let them discover, in their operating rooms and hospital wards, that it is not safe to place their lives in the hands of a man whose life they have throttled.

Ayn Rand - Atlas Shrugged


The next time you find yourself supporting or even romanticizing the idea of socialized medicine, I suggest you catch the next flight to Rome. Skip the normal stuff; the tours of the Coloseo, the Pantheon and the Fontana di Trevi. Instead, head straight for Policlinico Hospital right in the heart of Rome. You'll immediately notice how well-funded, safe, and clean it is and also what a high-level of technology is being used. Next you'll find out what patient care really means. Then make sure to have a friend in the hospital for something serious and have her tell you about how great she is being treated, how fantastic the staff is at their jobs and how much they care for each and every patient in the room (8 of them).

If that didn't come across clearly, I was being sarcastic, very, very sarcastic. My poor friend has been in the hospital here for like 10 days and is absolutely miserable. Being in a hospital for an extended period of time is already one of the worst things for anyone to go through but try doing it outside of the u.S. She's being treated poorly and with techniques that are dated and in a facility that one could call a "hospital" only in euphemistic terms. It makes me sick that people actually think that "free" health care is the way to go.

With the Ayn Rand quote in mind, ask yourself why Silvio Berlusconi, Italy's richest man, traveled to Cleveland, Ohio to have his heart surgery. I'm almost positive he didn't go to The Cleve for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame or to get a taste of America's hottest culinary scene (no joke) though maybe he stayed for it.

7/24/1978

"Oh but strawberries will never taste so good again and the thighs of women have lost their clutch!"

John Steinbeck's lament is a good one about getting older and how things will never be as good as they once were. Well, at least at age thirty, I have to disagree with Mr. Steinbeck. As for the former, strawberries are out of season right now but I just ate an amazing peach and the latter, well, that's a definite no.

If you toss out the last few months of my life, I can truly say I feel better than ever. Much room remains for improvement and growth but I think I have a solid foundation on which I can make it happen. In terms of physical health, I'm feeling great but want to be even better and more focused. Mental health is a far more complicated issue these days. I'm taking a beating but I'm fighting the good fight. The language is still a problem. But lately, I've become a whole lot more confident and in reality, I'm much better than I give myself credit for. Even if there are moments I go completely red in the face, I know that I will eventually be where I want to be. Rome is much less of a mystery than it was on my 28th and even 29th birthday. Not only the language, but the gestures, and the buses, just about everything is slowing down (except the drivers) and becoming more comprehensible (except the drivers). Though, I must admit that I took a bus one night recently that I thought was going in the direction of my apartment and I ended up getting lost for about 35 minutes in a neighborhood I'd never been in. However, I found my way home. A slip-up here and there is to be expected and it kind of made me laugh afterwards.

Sure, a lot of things aren't as I had expected them to be on this day but I never turned in that life plan that we were supposed to write in high school. Had I written that plan, I doubt I would have done, what I have done. I would have never celebrated my 21st birthday while living and working in Las Vegas, Nevada. I definitely wouldn't have celebrated my 23rd birthday in a stank cow-town known as Ellensburg (it doesn't smell anymore), Washington while attending Central Washington University after transferring from UW. And last but not least, not in my wildest dreams would I have planned to celebrate my 30th while living and working in Roma, Italy!

Maybe at age 40 or 50 I will have to bow to Steinbeck's words but at age 30 he's wrong on both accounts.

For a Laugh

After a two year visit to the United States, Michelangelo's David is returning to Italy......

His Proud Sponsors were:

Thanks Angela!

Like a Stone in the Sea

I don't know how to fully describe what's been happening to me over the last few weeks. In reality, I'm still fleshing things out. Life was good or so I thought. I was certain that A was A. I'm still certain A is A but life isn't so good. Lately, order has become a thing of the past for me. I used to know exactly what I had to do, whether it was for work, for Allie or whatever. Now I show up to lessons that were canceled. I hope this only because right now half of my students are on holiday so it's hard to keep track of who has lessons and who doesn't. However, I don't remember having this problem last summer.

My social life is also a bit strange at the moment. Maybe it's because I'm not working so much right now but I have no desire be at home but when I'm at home I have no desire to leave home, no desire to sleep, no desire to do much of anything. Don't get me wrong, I'm constantly doing things but a lot of the time I don't know if I'm doing it to do it or just to get out of the house. I'm really trying hard to not end up like Jon Favreau in Swingers, picture a broken and bearded man sitting alone on the floor of his empty apartment drinking orange juice from the bottle and eating beef jerky. I had planned to stay in last night and I was going to but then I got a phone call at 1:30 a.m. from some friends who were at a bar. A year ago I would have laughed, told them to bugger off and went back to bed with my beautiful wife. Now, I don't have a beautiful wife and I didn't have to work in the morning so I thought, "What the hell!" and caught a taxi a short while later.

When I meet new girls, I don't know what to say to them (this has always been a problem, now it's slightly different). Do I tell them my wife left me or just lie about most of my life and what I'm doing here and what I've done for the last seven years. It's amazing the number of times I've started sentences with the third person "We came to Rome..." and then I have to remember that it's only me now.

Back to the Well

Well, not exactly but I did work at the pub last night. A couple of the bartenders are on holiday right now so they asked me to fill in for the night. I need the money and knew it would be fun to get behind the bar again. I don't think I'll go back to work there but maybe I'll pick up shifts here and there in August while the hours are slow at the school. It would be a lot of fun to work there during the upcoming football season but I don't know if I could balance teaching and bartending but who knows.

Wallowing in My Own Crapulence

"With Smithers out of the way, I was free to wallow in my own crapulence"

Mr. Burns to the Springfield Police



I don't recall the particular Simpsons episode (perhaps when Maggie shoots Mr. Burns?) but I've always loved the phrase since. Kind of sums up how I'm feeling in a funny but poignant way. Besides not sleeping well as of late and not working much, things are fine, all things considered.

There have been a few bright spots for me though. For example, a friend was moving so she decided to donate a bunch of stuff to me including a printer and a tv! Sweet deal, no? Free tv's and printers don't fall from the sky. All I had to do was to go to her apartment and pick up the loot. Unfortunately, a tv isn't exactly something I can lug through the streets and into the subway. So I had to pony up the mouse for a cab, no problem. The cab ride cost me 17 euros. A few days later when I got around to setting up the tv, I discovered it doesn't work! At this point, it will not turn on at all. I assume that it worked for her and that this wasn't some sick joke being played at my expense but I'm more than a little irritated at the moment. In fact, tv's might start falling from the sky very soon.

I suppose that one doesn't count as a bright spot after all. Okay, here's one. My friends and I have been trying to set up a 5 on 5 soccer match for quite some time and last Wednesday we finally had the field reserved, the players signed up and we were ready to rediscover our glory days. With ten guys everyone pays five euros and it's a cheap night and a really good laugh for an hour. The field was reserved for 9 o'clock. Twenty after 9, there were four of us and for some reason the other guys didn't want to call it off for the night and slip out the side hatch as I had suggested at the start. Of course, I ended up spending twenty euros instead of five.

Oops, that one's not really a bright spot either.

Okay, here's one. Florence was great and Kevin really helped me out a lot. We had planned on seeing this beautiful estate with some of the best grounds in all of Italy. The weather was wonderful all morning and then all of a sudden the skies opened up and there was a torrential downpour. No joke. We tried to hide under the roof of the Uffizi for about 20 minutes but then we decided just to make a break for it and run back to Kevin's apartment. Bad idea. We were bombed on by chunks of hail the size of marbles. Here is a little video of the rain and how I looked after, just for funsies. Sorry for the shoddy cameraphone video work. Make sure to check out David's Ass in the background (not the real David's Ass though).

I'm still smiling like a clown though.

Two Years Abroad!

Two years here in Roma! An exasperating, exhausting and frustrating city for me at times but also a city that some days I feel almost at home in. Yeah, the public transport is awful. Yeah, the city lacks a music scene. Yeah, the gypsies are a blight. Yeah, the Italians are impossible at times. But...there are moments, however, sometimes fleeting, that I think that if all of these things were to be corrected, what would be the point of living here. I came here for a challenge and an adventure. I'm certainly getting them now.

It's hard to believe that it's been two whole years. Two years of celebration. Two years without Welch's Grape Juice. Two years of learning from scratch. Two years of travelling. Two years of trying my best. I've been to places that I'd never dreamt of going to. I've made friends from all over the world. I've given everything I had to make this happen.

Two years of constant struggle. If it wasn't one thing, it was a another. If everything was going well, there was always the language problem. If the language problem was becoming less of a barrier, then there was the money problem. If the money problem was ok, then we were apart because of my job at the pub or her job. If we were apart because of our jobs...well you know where that one is going/went anyway. It seems strange that I'm sitting here alone after two years of sharing everything here in Roma and meeting every challenge with the one I loved.

If I may look at the brightside (I think there is one, anyway), I feel as though a millstone has been lifted from my neck. With this newfound lightness, comes the opportunity to do somethings I wouldn't have done before because of OUR plans and what WE wanted. Well, now they are only MY plans and what I want. Talking about what I want is a little frightening but I think I'm starting to come around to the idea with lots of help and support from family and good friends.

I've been feeling somewhat "stuck" in Roma over the last few weeks and I've also felt as though I'm on a bit of a slippery slope in a lot matters. Fortunately, my friend from CWU, Kevin, is studying in Florence for the month and he invited me to stay with him at his apartment in the center of town for the weekend. It was an opportunity I couldn't miss. I mean, I hadn't seen him for two years and now he's only two hours away! Immediately after my lessons on Friday, I caught the first train from Roma to Florence and he was able to meet me at the train station.

Kevin - White Salmon, Washington

It felt great to get out of Roma. I think the pace of my life decreased ten fold as soon as I stepped off the train and that slippery slope evened out a bit. In no particular order, we wandered (read: stumbled) around the city, drank the local chianti, cooked some great food from the local market, ate at a favorite spot of his, listened to his friend play the flute in front of the Uffizi (he's a professional) and basically played tourist for the weekend.

At this point, I think we had been wandering and drinking the local chianti (maybe a bit much?) but we stumbled (not literally) into a piazza that has a famous wild boar statue that you have to rub its snout for good luck. Notice the snout is gold now! That's a lot of snout rubbing! I tried that with Juliet's breast in Verona, a lot of good that did me! So what the heck, Juliet didn't bring me any luck but perhaps the wild boar will.

The next we did some proper tourist things. After two years my tourism skills still could use some obvious improvement. We went to see David by Donatello at the Bargello Museum but unfortunately they were doing restoration to the statue so we missed out on that. Where the hell was the wild boar on that one! They do have a lot of other great sculptures though. This one was one my favorite. I don't even know the name but I find it so triumphant and romantic. Yeah, still a bad tourist.


Warning: Male Frontal Statue Nudity!

Triumph!

He's also crushing what looks to be the dragon/dog looking thing from A Neverending Story under his foot! Badass!

I did finally get to see The David of Michaelangelo after being in Florence twice before. We didn't have to wait too long to get into the museum and to see David (Thanks to The Boar!) David is very impressive in terms of size and beauty and it is well-deserving of its iconic status but I much prefer the Bernini David that we have here in Roma.

We also managed to spend a lot of time doing absolutely nothing. Which is what I was kind of hoping for in the first place. I'm happy that I was finally able to see David but what I really wanted was to spend some time relaxing and I also wanted to get some decent sleep again. Both of which I achieved in Florence. We spent a few hours overlooking the river on Saturday afternoon before Kevin made me dinner. It felt great to have someone make me dinner for a change!

Thanks Kevin!

The weekend came to an end far too quickly and I had to head back to Roma because of that pesky work thing. I really feel that it was what I needed and at just the right moment to keep me from that slippery slope.

Spaghetti al Cacio e Pepe

For 6 people:
Spaghetti - 600 grams
Parmigiano - 100 grams
Extra Virgin Olive Oil - 1 Tablespoon
Salt
Pepper - a lot

Add the spaghetti to salted, boiling water. At this point add the tablespoon of oil. When the pasta is al dente drain the water but not completely. Leave a little water in with the pasta, slowly stir in the parmigiano so it does not clump together. This isn’t a saucy pasta so there shouldn’t be much water left after you’ve mixed in the parmigiano and the pepper. Serve with more grated parmigiano and freshly ground pepper.

Simple but good and most people have these ingredients in their pantry at all times.

Bruschette Semplice

You are all very lucky that you can make your bruschette outside on your Weber grill as the summer evening is cooling off. If I want to make them, I have to turn on the oven to 500 degrees which is absolutely insane considering it has been, on average, 95 degrees here for the last 2 weeks.

What you need:

Hot coals
Day or two old bread, nothing airy, you want thick, sturdy bread
Extra Virgin Olive Oil
A clove of garlic, whole and unpeeled
Any toppings you want

First step is to slice your bread into 1 inch thick pieces. Drizzle one side with olive oil and a tiny pinch of salt. Toss them on the hot, hot grill with the oiled side down. After you get the nice grill marks (a little burn is good too), flip them over, add another small drizzle of oil and grill them for another minute or two. Here is the key, take the unpeeled, clove of garlic and cut one end of it off and then LIGHTLY rub it across the toast, one time! You should immediately get the lovely scent of garlic on the hot bread. If you love garlic and don't mind tasting it for a few days, feel free to get crazy with it. Also, I leave the peel on because I don't like the smell of garlic on my fingers, ma come voui (but how you want)! The last step is to add the toppings, another drizzle of olive oil and a pinch of salt in that order (or you end up with all of the salt on the plate and not the food). Buon appetito!

Greenish-Red tomatoes* with torn basil and olive oil
Sweet Cherry Tomatoes with torn basil and olive oil

You could just as easily add some nice mozzarrella to these and have Bruschette Caprese, another favorite is with arugula and cherry tomatoes. Really, what you pile on top is your business, just mind the simple procedure and you'll be really happy.

*Avoid using really ripe red tomatoes because they end up soaking your bread and you lose the "toastiness" of it. That's why they use the unripe tomatoes here a lot of the time.

The Fourth of July Weekend

Here in Roma, we started celebrating The Fourth of July at midnight on Friday and we didn't stop until Sunday morning. It was fun to see how proud Americans are of their country and even if the rest of the world hates us (more or less true). We still love what our country stands for and one of those things is NOT caring about what the rest of the world thinks of us.

It's also an interesting contrast to be here in Italy where there hasn't been much nationalism at all since the end of WWII. Italians identify first of all with their city, then their region and finally with Italy, as a country. It's strange to think about, but the u.S. has been a unified country longer than Italy has. This accounts for a part of the real bad blood that exists between the north and south here in Italy. While in the American north, we just kind of look down on the south but we certainly don't hate them!

I walked by a street vendor selling American flag bandanas and I couldn't resist. I decided that I had to have one. Of course, when I asked how much for the American flag bandanas he asked me if I liked "Booosh", the standard question received by every American abroad nowadays. I politely responded with a non-answer and went on my merry way. But I didn't want to be the only jack-ass out there wearing one so I bought one for my buddy Giles too. Turns out we weren't the only people out showing their pride. We passed a group of about 60 early-twenties Americans that were all decked out. The guys were draped in the flag and the girls were all wearing the flag as a top. Of course, the America, F**k Yeah! chant started soon after.

I had honestly never felt truly proud to be American when I lived in America but these last two years have helped me realize how great America is, even with all of her faults.

Emily - Somewhereville,uSA, Me - Pirateville, and Jenn (my new roomie) - New York, NY

Giles - Milwaukee, WI

Caroline (a Brit Turncoat!) - London, England and Sarah - Cape Cod, MA

Dave - Glasgow, Scotland

Everybody wants to be American, whether they admit it or not!

Between Love and Hate

I had planned on eating some grilled chicken breast for lunch today but to no avail. The chicken had gone turned on me so I had to throw it out or risk a bout of food poisoning. So I had to settle for my comfort food of choice (pbj) which was fine but not what I had really planned on eating.

That was like the fifth time that's happened not only with chicken but also with a lot of other fruit and veg in the last month. This is something that I never let happen before. So as I was eating my sandwich I started thinking about the problem. Why is it that I keep letting things go bad without noticing? At what point did the chicken turn? Why didn't I notice the smell? Why didn't I cook it sooner? Seems to be a fitting metaphor for my life right now. Hell, throw out the chicken, throw out the marriage.

Yesterday, we signed the divorce papers.

I have to admit that I reacted poorly. Allie responded accordingly to my reaction. We said words to each other that we had never uttered in the last seven years. What I said didn't help me feel better in the least, quite the opposite really. I know why I'm saying these unfounded and mean things to Allie and I wish I wasn't but I can't help myself. No, that's a lie. I could have helped myself, I just want her to hurt as badly as I do. I'm burning that bridge until there is nothing left but ash (side note, it's probably next to impossible to find an actual bridge that will burn nowadays, maybe we should start saying "blow up"). The bridge is blown up. The bridge is burnt. Regardless of choice of prose or construction materials, be it wood, concrete or steel, the bridge is no longer in service.

Exit Scene - Take 1
*Cue the sad music, courtesy of Dashboard Confessional*
And...action!

I watched her pack up the last of her things and leave. She walked out the door to the elevator. Now, in a film or on tv, the elevator would have opened up right away and whisked her out of my life, easy-peasy. But this is an old building with an old elevator in a country that seems at times to be just barely out of or slipping back into third-world status, so it took a few minutes for it to arrive. During this time, I couldn't help but stand at the door and watch her leave me. She asked why I was standing and watching. I replied that I didn't know. And I still don't know. If I were to venture a guess, I would say that I wanted to make sure this was really happening to us.

Timshel!

"But the Hebrew word, the word timshel—‘Thou mayest’— that gives a choice. It might be the most important word in the world. That says the way is open. That throws it right back on a man. For if ‘Thou mayest’—it is also true that ‘Thou mayest not.’

Now, there are many millions in their sects and churches who feel the order, ‘Do thou,’ and throw their weight into obedience. And there are millions more who feel predestination in ‘Thou shalt.’ Nothing they may do can interfere with what will be. But ‘Thou mayest’! Why, that makes a man great, that gives him stature with the gods."

It is easy out of laziness, out of weakness, to throw oneself into the lap of deity, saying, ‘I couldn’t help it; the way was set.’ But think of the glory of the choice! That makes a man a man. A cat has no choice, a bee must make honey."

John Steinbeck - East of Eden


Thou Mayest! With these words I'm trying to begin a new period of my life. With a new roommate moving in this afternoon, less than a month before my 30th birthday, just a few weeks shy of living in Roma for two years and at the end of a nearly 7 year old relationship. I have to keep those words with me.

This month has been a struggle. You've read the previous posts. I have these moments of blinding hatred followed by absolute clarity and confidence that can and do happen at any and all times of the day. It's making me crazy. Practically everyday, I see old friends and they, without hesitation, ask about Allie. How she's doing, where she is, etc. Most people still don't know our situation. Then I have to make the choice between lying to an acquaintance or just telling them the truth and once again opening the wound. Either way I lose. I'm tired of pouring salt into my wounds.

Allie is moving out as soon as she returns home from Bologna tomorrow or the next day, I'm not sure when she'll be back. She's been on holiday the entire month of June while I've sat in a room full of our memories and the things that made up the life we once shared. But I'm trying hard not to dwell on them, they will soon be gone and so will she.

The possibilities are here for me. Steinbeck is right, it's all on me to make not only glorious choices but glorious things happen. And if Steinbeck is correct then the way is open before me and I have only to make the necessary effort to find it.

Rome isn't such a bad place, after all.

In this newly found single life that I’m leading, I’ve noticed that I have a lot of things going on. Suddenly, I’m a man about town. Or something like that. One of my students offered to buy me dinner last Friday evening, needless to say, I accepted without hesitation. Once we met up we decided to have sushi at a place near his house. It was one of those conveyor belt type places which is something of an oddity here in Rome but old-hat for Americans. Anyway, dinner was good, not the best sushi ever but good, nevertheless. We had been speaking in sort of a pigeon, half-English half-Italian, language all evening.

After dinner, the server asked if we wanted a coffee, I said yes (in Italian, of course). Then he started clowning me to Federico by asking him if I really wanted a cappuccino or an American coffee. Now, a little background. In Italy, a cappuccino after morning is a no-no and to have one after a Japanese dinner is utterly inexplicable to Italians. He knew I was a foreigner so he was just bustin’ chops by making the cappuccino comment. Without even thinking, I said “vaffanculo!” which translates to “fuck off!” Then I proceeded to tell him, in Italian, I didn’t want a cappuccino, a caffe Americano, or anything but an espresso! Needless to say, the server (a mountain of a man, to say the least) and Federico were shocked. Then I realized that I had said something I really shouldn’t have said, I immediately apologized to him. They throw that term around here in Rome like it's nothing but it is really something friends say to friends at the bar, not foreigners to Italians in restaurants.

A few minutes later he brought the coffee out…he walked up to the table with the plate and cup in his hand. What I couldn’t see was that he had put the spoon through the handle of an empty cup. Then he pretended to stumble towards me and dump the coffee into my lap. The cup was empty and because the spoon was threaded through the handle and in his hand nothing spilled or fell on me. I screamed like a little girl and I have to admit I had quite a scare. I really thought I was about to have hot coffee dumped onto my lap. Federico said my face was priceless, and I don’t doubt that. After we all had a good laugh about it and I apologized even more before we left.

The server taught me a very valuable lesson, one that Hemingway had tried to warn me about in For Whom the Bell Tolls or A Farewell to Arms, I'm having trouble remember which it's from right now: One should only curse in one’s native tongue.

Man Overboard!

"He calls desparingly, gazing in anguish after the receding sail as, ghostlike, fades from view. A short time ago he was on board, a member of the crew busy on deck with the rest, a living being with his share of air and sunlight. What has become of him now? He slipped and fell, and this is the end."

Victor Hugo - Les Miserables


Don't worry, I'm not jumping off any ships. I use that paragraph, not for telling you all that I'm a man overboard but, actually quite the opposite. I feel like I've been saved by my family and friends. This situation could have broken me but instead it's made me remember what kind of person I am. It's really easy to tell what kind of person you are when you take a look at your family and friends. I've been overwhelmed with all of the support I've received. People are coming out of the woodworks for me and it's a great feeling. For this, I'm truly grateful.

In other news, Allie has returned from her vacation and is back at the apartment for the next week. She will be out of the apartment by the end of the month. Things are strange, of course, but I will try my best to be amicable. After that, I don't know what will become of her. I'm trying not to concern myself, though it's really, really hard. She's not telling and I'm not asking.

At this point, I'm going to make an honest attempt to keep her name out of my mouth, for better or worse in an attempt to keep myself from slipping and falling.

Later That Day...

"Every line is about,
Who I don't want to write about anymore." Jesse Lacey



The following was written the day after my breakdown that occurred between Saturday evening and Sunday morning, June 8th.


So, as I start my second watch* on Via Gallia, I wonder what I'm going to see or even accomplish by doing this. I would rather see it with my own eyes than have to believe Allie at this point. A year ago, I would have laughed at the thought of me doing this or this whole situation. "Not possible," I would have said. Well, now I'm literally standing on the sidewalk waiting for them to pull up. It's a cold and ugly day here in Rome, kind of like how I feel inside me. This type of behavior will definitely not win her back but that's not what I want anyway. This sucks, staring at every car that pulls up, just wanting to really be crushed once and for all. What exactly am I hoping for? Man, this sucks. I feel so bad, so sick inside over all of this.

* They were supposed to arrive earlier but there was traffic on the GRA (the ring around Rome) so they arrived later than she had originally told me. She was polite enough to call though, I might have stood outside for two hours in the cold if she hadn't called to tell me.

My Breakdown

"We do not claim that the portrait we are making is the whole truth, only that it is a resemblance." Victor Hugo

After three weeks of avoiding each other while being in the same apartment, I was ready to finally get the cards on the table. Allie was supposed to come home Friday afternoon (June 6th), she had normally been arriving home at about 3p.m. It wasn't until 5p.m. that I got a text message saying that she was staying for the weekend so she could go to the local festival they were having. My heart sank.

I figured she was staying there so she could stay with her "crush" for one last weekend because she was finished with her course in Loreto and would no longer get to be with him during the week. But naturally, she didn't say that's what she was doing, so I hoped for the best. I figured she might be staying with Jules and another one of our friends, Dallas. On Saturday afternoon, I saw Dallas, my heart sank again. Then later in the evening I saw Jules at the Abbey, it was like a stab through my heart. At this point, the truth was all too obvious. I decided to leave the pub soon after I saw Jules.

Now here's where it gets a little embarrassing for me but I'll try to give the whole story. I walked out in a complete daze, not from alcohol though. I walked home, hoping to cool off and get rid of that jittery, sick feeling that was running through me. After the forty-five minute walk, I was really sick to my stomach. I tried to find sleep, but I couldn't stop thinking about what she was doing to me.

Unfortunately, I called her for the first time at 2a.m., no answer. Tried again. Tried again. She always answers her phone when I call. Then I called her at 3a.m., no answer. Tried again. Tried again. Then I took some Nyquil, read, watched some television, hoping that something would help, but to no avail. I called her at 4a.m. Finally, I went to sleep for about an hour because I was so exhausted and worked up. I woke up and I called her again. Anyway, you see what was happening. This pattern of sleep an hour, call Allie, sleep an hour, call Allie, continued up until like 9 in the morning. I probably called her fifteen times. I'm not proud of myself for losing control. For one of the first times in my life, I wasn't thinking rationally.

Not to Change the Subject But...

Please, don't worry about me too much, though I do love the support. I'm really having a nice/normal day today. I haven't had too many flashes of red and or evil thoughts about Allie. As you all know, my favorite place is Rome isn't the Coloseo, the Trevi Fountain, or the Pantheon (though I love that one), it's my neighborhood market.

Sounds stupid but I love to cook and I love to try new things. I've been going to our neighborhood market every Saturday for the past year and my face is pretty well-known to some of the vendors there. With all of this stuff going on for the last month I hadn't been going to the market and in fact hadn't been eating very well at all. My standard fruit after the meal thing went out the window because the fruit at the supermarket is "schifo" or nasty and is just a waste of money when I can get great produce from my guy. I kind of stopped cooking for the most part and was just eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (my comfort food of choice). It felt great to see their smiling faces and be welcomed back when I walked up to their stalls.

I had really lost the joy of cooking during all of this. I would think about Allie making some dish that I taught her for her next boyfriends and how much joy my cooking would bring them and I would get really pissed off. Not only would the guy have my wife but also my cooking! A wandering mind is a terrible thing! Actually, the funny thing about that is that I was imagining Allie cooking! I know, that probably sounds a bit psychotic and I kind of agree, but this is how my mind is working nowadays. But I digress.

Today, I went to the market for the first time in about a month. Sometime in the last four weeks the season had changed! Gone were the apples and oranges. First, I saw a few true signs of summer in Rome...white peaches and watermelons! But they were at a different stand than mine so I decided to wait. It made me excited to see what was going to be available for me at my stand. They had a giant pile of cherries! Huge, Dark as the night cherries! I'm pretty skeptical about cherries unless I'm buying them from an orchard in Yakima or from a Mexican in a white van on the side of the road in Federal Way. But I couldn't resist and I bought a little over a pound. Not Yakima quality, of course, but pretty damn good.

It felt great to get back to what was such a normal routine thing for so long. Now I'll be cooking for one but that doesn't mean I can't eat well!

Things Fall Apart, Part 2

Happier Days?

You may rightfully ask yourself, why didn’t he fight for her? I admit, I didn’t fight for her. She has knowingly done this to me for almost a year and I knew that I would never recover mentally if I tried to convince her to stay with me. I also knew that I would become more and more paranoid and make meaner and meaner comments to her (something I'm already doing) that would eventually drive her away anyway. For me, even if she hadn’t physically cheated on me at this point I knew it would happen eventually because she no longer cared about “We” in the way I did.

I told her when everything happened last year that I wanted her 100% and no less because I loved her 100%. Well, when she told me that she wanted to split from me she said she was 60% sure. A far cry from the 100% that I wanted and deserved. I knew that she had made up her mind long ago and I don’t want someone who doesn’t want me. It’s hard to believe that at the same time she was writing such sweet things about me on our blog that she was thinking about divorcing me but if you check the timeline it’s true.

She was a ghost the entire time in Florence, her mind was on divorcing me and spending more time with her crush but when you read that entry it’s crazy to think that a week later that person would ask for a divorce. I loved Allie because she was so logical and rational among all of the other great qualities, and above all, she was always the same person. Anyone who thinks love isn’t rational is wrong. Look at the person you are in love with and ask yourself if they represent the highest of your values. She did. They have to be a direct reflection of your highest values or else you’re simply evading reality (borrowing heavily from my favorite author) and that can only end badly. Allie had always been that way for me. My values haven’t changed so whose did?

Over the last year and especially the last few months she became like a stranger to me. I thought it was because living and working abroad for two years will change a person but I think it has to be more than that. She has become obsessed with her body image among other things. She told me that she has a lot of negative thoughts about herself and that she doesn’t know what she’s doing anymore. Pretty scary, I tried to support her for so long about these things but nothing I did or said seemed to help. No matter how many times I told her she looked more beautiful than ever or that she had lost a lot of weight her response was always that she felt “gross” or that she had just gained four pounds over the week even though she hadn’t stepped on a scale for months and months.


My praise and support wasn’t enough and she has really been feeding off of all of the attention she has been receiving from her male students. She told me that she had never received so much attention before and that it felt really good. I suppose it is kind of like a drug for a girl or even a guy to hear how beautiful they are from the opposite sex. It turned out to be a drug that I couldn’t compete with.

Real Homies, Down since I picked him up from Pier 77

Things Fall Apart, Part 1

Well, I suppose it’s time to tell you all what’s been happening over the last month or so. Allie told me that she wanted a divorce back on May 24th and at the same moment she told me not to tell anyone for some reason. Needless to say, I was shocked but not completely.

Our problems started last summer, I found a very graphic “story” that she had written about a friend of ours that she had a huge crush on. Of course, reading the “story” crushed me in so many ways. I immediately confronted her about it and she explained it was only a story and that she had embellished what she had written for the sake of storytelling. I flew off the handle and blamed the guy and refused to speak with him again. Unfortunately, I chose the wrong person to be angry with but how could I not take my Allie’s side? He was completely innocent to Allie’s crush and was/is just a genuinely nice guy, albeit, quite handsome. And in reality and to be fair to Allie, nothing happened between the two of them. It was the first time in our relationship that I had some major doubts about Allie’s honesty, integrity and her love.

Allie and I worked it out and I forgave her because it really wasn’t anything but some words (pretty graphic and gut-wrenching to read) and a little crush but it was impossible to forget what she had done. I have to admit I became some what paranoid after that happened. I tried many times to get her to make friends with some girls so she could have fun while I worked for us at the pub in the evening. She wouldn’t do it. She is pretty antisocial and has become more so over the last year and she is especially antisocial with other girls, and that's according to her. In the meantime, she was getting more and more friendly with her students at the Air Force, she was constantly getting text messages from her students at all hours of the night and became very secretive about it. I decided not to yell at her and not to tell her to stop it because I thought by me giving her my trust she would do me no wrong.

Unfortunately, it did bother me a lot, so I went the passive aggressive and truly wrong route and would make comments such as “which one of your boyfriend’s is texting you now?” and the like. She had a married student texting her with elicit messages that were “jokes” but I didn’t find them funny and she knew it. But I tried not to let it bother me. She didn't get mad when she went out to dinner with another one of her married students that she knew liked her and had actually told her that he liked her. Funny thing is that he was supposedly a really nice guy that did everything for his wife and then she cheated on him! Sound familiar? I thought the guy was a real A-hole for hitting on Allie but I suppose she flirted back with him just like the rest of the guys. I let this behavior happen because I felt so bad that I wasn’t at home with her but I was at the pub earning money for US. I let her go for a motorcycle ride with yet another student we met in Loreto after we had returned to Rome. I let it happen because I trusted her. All the while, she knew it was bothering me but she did nothing to change her behavior.

When I finally decided to quit the pub because I had enough hours at the school she was heading off to Loreto. She found a guy that she was attracted to and he was attracted to her. She actually told me about this crush, well sort of. She said “there is this guy Jules likes but I think he likes me” That was all. I didn’t say anything because how can you not be attracted to Allie. She’s beautiful, funny, smart, seemingly everything that is great in a person. Soon after things really started to deteriorate between us.

Then during the weekends when she said she would come back and spend time with me she actually came back grouchy, tired and nothing to do with me even though I wasn’t working at all, she would stay in bed and say she was so tired from working all week. And when she did come home, all she did was send text messages to mysterious people and let me feed her. I practically had to beg her to meet me, Diego, and Jillian in Florence. In fact, she was too tired to come back Friday so she stayed until Saturday morning. Turns out she wasn’t too tired to go to the disco into the wee hours with her crush. So when she met us she was a ghost The next weekend, on Friday night at about 11pm after we ate dinner with Diego, Jillian and our Scottish friend, Alistair, she got a phone call and immediately left our group and went and had a secret conversation on the phone. I noticed it but I chose not to notice it. The next day she told me she wanted out. She didn’t say the actual word “divorce” because she is so passive aggressive she made me say it for her. Thereby, relieving her of the burden. I suppose it was only right because I’ve done everything possible for her for the last 6 plus years, always putting myself second to her.

I have much more to write but I just wanted to get it rolling for now.

*This may appear a one-sided account of the story and that is true it has been written by a fairly bitter man. I tried to be as polite as possible though I’m not sure why anymore. She will no longer be writing on this blog and as of this moment she is with the family of her “crush” for the next ten days to practice her Italian, so forgive me for being a little hostile. Though, it's probably for the best because I've been mean to her a lot this week.

Tuscan Butcher

Ok...I do realize that it's been nearly a month since we've posted anything, and I am truly sorry. But, I am still away in Loreto doing my course, and so Charles has been rendered unable to post stories about his adventures with Diego and Jillian since I have the computer with me.
But, last weekend we all went off together to finally visit the famed restaurant and butcher shop of Dario Cecchini. Charles first read about Dario before we even moved to Italy, in the book called Heat. In the book, the author describes his experiences with Dario and his behavior and attitudes towards all things meat. In short, he is painted as a lunatic, and we were hoping to experience some of the magic! So, when he opened up his restaurant to showcase his famous meat, we knew that we would eventually have to get our butts over there and experience what all the fuss was about.
So, we decided to take the opportunity of having Diego and Jillian in town to rent a car and finally make the drive out there. His butcher shop is in a tiny town in Tuscany, a few kilometers outside of Florence. The view from the hill-top village is absolutely stunning, and when we arrived we were greeted by a small festival taking place in the street between his butcher shop and restaurant. Musicians were playing, people were drinking wine and tasting samples of some of his products. We mingled for a few minutes, taking in the sights and watching the legendary man in his element, lumbering around behind his meat counter and even stepping into the street to dance with the musicians.
That night we eagerly anticipated the 6 course meal that was to come. When we arrived at the restaurant we were shown to a large communal table and given a sheet of paper to describe the philosophy of Dario and his restaurant. In fact, it stated that we were not in a restaurant, but rather in the home of a butcher, and basically (although more tactfully) if we didn't like something we could get the hell out. Luckily, and not surprisingly, everything was delicious! We spoke a bit with other couples at the table (we were the only non-Italians), and spent a wonderful two hours devouring course after course of meats and vegetables.
We had a great time, and would definitely recommend this off-the track place to anyone coming to Italy in the future. It was such a fun and unique experience, the terrible weather couldn't even put a damper on our memory of it!

Allie All Alone: Part 2

My second week away from Charles is coming to an end tomorrow.

Yes, I realize tomorrow is only Wednesday, but since Thursday is a holiday here they've decided to also cancel class for Friday so everyone can go home and visit their families for a long weekend. So, naturally, this week has just flown by and I am very happy to get home and relax. We have decided that since we both have Thursday off we will make our first official trip to the sea! Unfortunately the forecast isn't perfect (partly cloudy), but I am excited anyway!

This course is going quite well, and I'm enjoying my students immensely. Unfortunately I am only a substitute in this particular course and next week will be my last with these boys. They are also disappointed about the change-up, but I think it has something more to do with the fact that they saw their teacher's photo today in the hallway and they've decided a young teacher is more their taste. Italian men...they're all the same!

On Sunday Charles and I made a ragu together for lunch, and I brought the leftovers with me back to Loreto. It was enough to get me through this whole "week", so my taste buds didn't suffer as much as last week! Charles told me that since I've been gone he's also lost the drive to cook any kind of real food. He said that it's just not fun when you don't have anyone to do it for! Of course, this is great news to me because as I was re-reading my last post I was beginning to think I should get off my lazy butt and do some of the cooking sometimes, and now I have a wonderful excuse not to! :P

Bye Bye to the Abbey Theatre

After a year of complaining about how I need to quit the pub, I've finally taken my own advice. My last day will be sometime during the first week of May. I'm really excited about quitting just in time to enjoy the summer with Allie. The list of good reasons surely outweighed the list of reasons not to quit. The good reasons are plentiful (obviously most of important spending more time with Allie) while the bad reasons are pretty much that we will lose out on about 150 euros each week (hmm, that could be a good reason to quit too!) and a lot of free Jameson whiskey (maybe another good reason to quit!).

Allie All Alone: Part 1

This is just the beginning of my first week away from Charles, and I'm already starting to feel the pangs of longing! Luckily for me there's a holiday this Friday and I'll be able to go back to Rome on Thursday night!

I think that after being married for nearly four years (and having dated and lived together even longer than that) I have become thoroughly spoiled. You all know how much Charles loves cooking, and at first we did a lot of it together, and I can sincerely say that most of what I know I have learned from him. In recent months I have really taken a back-seat in the cooking department and have enjoyed delicious meals magically appearing in front of me with no concept of the time and effort that went into them (see last post). Even on the nights he works at Abbey we generally eat a meal together before he leaves for the night. If not, I'll have something like a bowl of cereal to hold me over. It's pathetic, but true.

Now that I am here on my own in Loreto I am really beginning to appreciate and miss what my husband does for me. Part of the problem here is that I don't have much to work with, and I am a bit unwilling to either pack it all up and bring it here, or to buy it again. For example, I have no spices, not even pepper. I actually meant to bring the pepper from home, but I forgot it and I figured this week I would suffer and then I'll bring it back with me for next week. So, the last two nights for dinner I've had chicken breast flavored with salt...which tastes like plain chicken breast.

I've had to pack my own lunches (yes, Charles did this for me the last time we were in Loreto), and so rather than having to wake up an extra 15 minutes earlier, I make a salad the night before to take with me in the morning. My salads aren't bad (it doesn't take much skill to cut up veggies) but again they are lacking some essentials: oil and vinegar would really improve the dry blandness that I masticate every afternoon.

I'm not starving to death on my own (this was actually a concern for me), but let's just say that I don't look forward to my next meal like I do when Charles cooks for me. It's totally normal for us to have just finished eating lunch when I ask what he's planning for dinner! In fact, as I write this and think about all the delicious goodies I'll be stuffed with this weekend I'm starting to salivate a bit!

Just two more days to get through and I'll be back in the cuisine capital of the world...not Rome; the kitchen of my apartment!!

Farewell Lunch

Here's my rendition of something we had in a little town near Loreto a few months back called Castelfidardo. You've probably heard of it because it is the birthplace of the accordion! Yeah...we'd never heard of it either but no matter, the pasta was great. This is a pasta that is best with some hard to find (but not impossible) ingredients in the greater Seattle area. The first is freshly made pasta called tagliolini but any fresh pasta would be great. The second is Guanciale (pig cheek bacon). If you really want, you can find guanciale at Armandino's Salumi (www.salumicuredmeats.com) in downtown Seattle near Qwest Field. It's most similar to bacon but it isn't smokey but you could probably substitute it with some nice bacon.


Ingredients for two:

Two whole cloves of garlic
4oz of guanciale
Fresh peas (any type of sweet pea would be fine)
Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Fresh pasta (or a dried long strand pasta, like fettucini)
Grated Parmigiano
Salt and Pepper

In a large pot, bring your water to a boil, add the fresh peas and cook until they are soft, then pull them out of the water and set aside, leave the water boiling. Add some salt to the water and your pasta. In a saute pan over medium-heat, cook the guanciale for a minute then add the two whole garlic cloves continue to saute but don't let the garlic get any darker than a light brown. Once you've got your bacon (drain off the fat if you like) cooked how you like, toss in the peas and saute for another minute or so. Once the pasta is cooked to nearly al dente, drain it but save a little of the cooking water. Add the pasta to the saute pan and give it a toss maybe adding a little of the cooking water (this isn't a 'saucy' pasta). Saute everything together for a minute in the pan and then drizzle a little oil over the pasta and finish with grated parmigiano. Salt and pepper to taste depending on the saltiness of the bacon.

Breaking News!

I mentioned in the last post that I would be heading to Loreto in May to do another month-long intensive course. Well, it was confirmed yesterday that I will actually be packing up and leaving THIS Sunday!

Another teacher who lives and works permanently in Loreto has a minor illness that requires surgery. She will be out for about three weeks having this done. She teaches the three-month intensive course, and so I am being sent as her substitute while she is gone, and it works out just perfectly that she will return in time for me to just continue on in Loreto and start the one-month course as orginally planned.

This is great news on the one hand, because the extra money is always welcome, but it's also bad news for the fact that Charles and I have to spend so much time apart! I still plan to come back to Rome on the weekends, but unfortunately Charles' Abbey Theatre schedule has had him working both Friday and Saturday nights for the last few weeks. So hopefully they'll have pity on us and he'll be able to trade at least one of those nights so we can be together!

Charles is "super sad" about me leaving, and has demanded that I call him every night at least for a second to say good night (as if I wouldn't!). I wish it could be that we were both going together like the last time, but for now he is working a lot teaching courses at American Express and being a slave to his other wife Abbey. Hopefully that will keep him distracted enough to get him through the five days a week without his Alsie!

Mid-April Update

Just a general update for you all:

The weather is resembling spring more and more each day. We are working, renting the room, and waiting patiently for the arrival of Diego and Jillian on May 14th. We love having friends visit! This year it should be a bit better for us than the last time Diego was here. Right now we have a bit more money than last year, so we'll actually be able to do some cool things with our friends this time around!

At this point it seems that I (Allie) will be heading back to Loreto for another month course starting May 12th. Charles won't be going this time so that he will be able to keep his job at the pub. It will be difficult to be apart all week long, but I'll come back to Rome every weekend to spend time with Charles, and it's only a month, so hopefully it will fly by. Of course, this is the period that Diego and Jillian will be here, so unfortunately I won't get a chance to spend much time with them, except for a weekend trip or two. But, you know what they say, "money's money."

Talk to Us!

Last night I downloaded the program Skype onto our computer. It might be the coolest thing ever. If you haven't heard of it, it's a program that lets you call people through your computer. If the other person has Skype, the call is totally free. If you want to call someone's house line or cell phone it's really cheap! I called my mom in Pasco last night and it was only 1cent per minute!

The only thing you might need to buy is a headset with a microphone so you can talk. I bought one with a webcam so I can do video chats as well! If you already have Skype, or you decide to take advantage of it and download the free program, let us know your contact info so we can say hi!

Looking forward to hearing from some of you!!

Summer Slim

In Italy, and especially in Rome, how you look is important! In fact, I would say it's importantissimo! It's almost impossible to determine how old an Italian woman is just by seeing her from the back. She could be 14 or 40, but by her body and her clothes you won't be able to tell (once you see her face, though, the years of sun abuse will clue you in really quickly to her real age, but that's another blog for another day.) The point is, they really put a lot of time and effort into their appearance (especially the women), and we have become so keenly adept at spotting American tourists that it's disturbing. They don't even have to speak and we instantly know that they are not only foreign, but clearly from the Good Ol' US of A.

Anyway, as you all know, we have been here nearly two years at this point (yes, it's really hard for us to believe it, too), and naturally we have begun to live a very Italian lifestyle. And it's more than just our regular intake of espresso! We do strange things now, like eat fruit after dinner and drink Coke Light instead of regular. Of course, with such a change in lifestyle we have naturally begun to see a change in our waistlines as well.

With the onset of summer arriving we decided that maybe we could step it up just a bit and see what would actually happen if we gave it a bit of effort. So we took some advice from an Italian friend who recently lost a lot of weight himself. Basically all we've done is stopped eating carbs at dinner. We still enjoy Chuckie's delicious pasta dishes at lunch time, but for dinner we stick to lean meats (lots of fish) and veggies. Naturally we try to be careful about over-indulging in all of the Italian sweets that call to us around every corner, but of course sometimes you just can't win that battle. In order to make up for those times when we give in to temptation, we've also started a little exercise routine. Just short jogs/walks in the neighborhood. We try to go everyday, but we aren't too hard on ourselves if we don't make it.

Like I said before, most of the work has already been done without us realizing it, and to show you what I'm talking about I present two photos of us as a couple. The first you probably have proudly displayed on your mantel piece at home (just kidding, unless you are our parents) from our wedding announcement, and the second was taken about a week ago. Just look at the difference!! You can really tell with Charles, it's incredible. I look at him everyday and say, "man, when did you get so skinny??" A lot of the time we wonder what we would look like today if we had stayed in America....scary!


The other day I decided that since we are feeling really proud of ourselves and like we're hot stuff it would be a good time to go shopping for a new bikini. I've avoided this task since we arrived in Italy because the only bathing suits you can find have the European cut bottoms. If you're not familiar with this, it is basically a backside half the size of your actual backside. Not exactly a thong (although you can find them quite easily as well), but for a somewhat conservative American girl, it feels like you've got a constant wedgie.

Anyway, I tried a few on, and was pleasantly surprised with how flattering it actually looked! This week we have been blessed with beautiful spring-like weather, and if it stays like this we will probably head to the sea on Thursday. It's still too cold to swim, but maybe we can get a head-start on our summer tans!