It Is What It Is

Many of the reasons we decided to move to Italy are exactly the same reasons that drive us insane about this country, I should say more specifically, Rome. I don’t know how many times we’ve cursed this country and its people for their refusal to change, improve or try new things. When you think about how bad it is going to a bank or the post office in the u.S., multiply that experience by ten in Italy. Customer service is truly an American concept. We spent nearly two hours in the local bank a few weeks back. There was one cashier open with literally twenty people waiting, we kept waiting for someone to call for “back up” like in America, only that never happened. At the supermarket, Allie and I stood around with some other dumbfounded people wanting to pay for our goods while EVERY cashier counted the money in their tills. It would make more sense to leave one cashier open so that people could still pay and get the hell out, right? The busses are packed with people who don’t pay for tickets and enjoy free rides daily. The transit cops do sort of a sting operation every month or so but it’s completely half-hearted and usually some poor tourist who couldn’t find a ticket machine gets the fine.

When we discuss these problems with our students they all give us a similar type of response. They say that it makes them angry as well but that’s the way it’s always been. The refusal to change is a hallmark of this country, perhaps refusal is a bit strong, maybe an unwillingness to change is a better way to put it. So for the post office, the bus, and the banks an unwillingness to change is a bad thing but on the other hand this same attitude has produced an amazing food tradition. For instance, recipes that have been unchanged for many generations will most likely remain unchanged. The response to “Why?” is always “That‘s the way it‘s always been done in my family.” It’s unlikely that America will ever have such a food tradition because of our willingness to try to which is new, that which is different and to see how we can change things to make them better. That willingness to change is great for places like the bank, post office and grocery store but bad for the dining room table. Well, I don’t mean say trying new recipes and foods is wrong but one will never create a coherent tradition such as is found in Italy.

As Americans, it’s our right to have what we want, when we want it. No questions asked and no sideways looks given. Such is not the case in Italy. For example, one should not order a cappuccino after breakfast here in Italy. It’s not a rule but a tradition (one of thousands, I swear!). For an American, this is perplexing to say the least. I find myself sometimes wanting to lecture my fellow Americans (sometimes I do) but then I also realize it goes against all that it means to be an American to deprive oneself of what one wants. The Italians are also equally perplexed by our behavior, they cringe in horror when someone orders a cappuccino after a pizza or a plate of pasta with clams (makes me cringe too!). Sometimes they refuse saying that the machine is cleaned or that they don’t have milk! Ha! But most of the time they acquiesce to our strange behavior and just laugh about it to their friends or on call-in radio shows.

So my dreams of combining the best of both worlds, i.e., all the efficiency of America with the traditions of Italy is something that will probably never come together. So unfortunately for me, it seems that I can’t have my cake and eat it too.